10 November 2005

this little piggy...

I have just discovered shoes.

Until now, I never much cared for them to be honest; I’ve always preferred to go barefoot and let my toes wiggle freely. I guess that makes me an atypical woman in this age of Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo. But I have always loved the texture of grass under my feet, the cushy fibers of a woven rug, the cold feel of tile. I guess you could say I like feeling grounded. And I know it sounds funny, but shoes have always made my feet feel like they are suffocating. I work at home in a who-needs-shoes-world, sitting cross-legged all day long in my leather desk chair the color of mashed peas. If I have to venture outside (to grab the mail, drive to the grocery store, walk the dog) it’s usually flip-flops or slip-on clogs depending on the season.

Then somehow, it happened. Recently, I discovered a love of shoes. I am starting slowly, easing myself into addiction with two new pairs, each for a different mood.

I began with a brown pair of sneakers with stripes on the side. They are easy and comfortable---good for the days when I just want to be my jeans-and-T-shirt self. The exciting thing (for me) about these new sneakers is that they differ from the shoes I wear to the gym. These are what you call “fashionable” sneakers. This is where I am branching out---realizing that one shoe does not, in fact, fit all occasions.

Next I found a brown pair of vintage-looking flats (the closest I will get to a stiletto any time soon) with a thin strap across the front and a bit of beige stitching on the toe. Okay, they give me blisters on my heels, but they are so cute that I hate to take them off. So I limp. And use a lot of band-aids.

Already I am different. I find myself noticing people’s feet wherever I go. (Perhaps there are more shoes out there I haven’t yet discovered.) I “browse” for shoes while I walk through the bookstore. I glance under tables at restaurants. I walk with my head down, not because I am ashamed of my new minor obsession, but because I can’t seem to quench my curiosity…what shoes are people wearing? Would they look good on my feet? Do they require socks?

The nicest shoes I have owned until now (including my wedding shoes) was a pair of tall black boots that my sister bought in Italy and gave me when she didn’t want them anymore (I think they hurt her feet.) I wore them with skirts, sometimes with jeans, mostly in the winter. They were very sleek and fashionable, not terribly comfortable, but so what? They were Italian leather boots. Then one day, Jeremy made a shocking announcement. He hated the boots. And not just these particular boots…ALL boots. It baffles the mind to think that someone could have such an aversion for something so harmless (even beautiful in their own way), but he was really sincere about his plea that I never, ever wear the boots again (and any others I might have hidden in the back of my closet.) He loathed those boots, I dare say, as much as I despise the hideous, faded, 1987, four sizes too big, Michael J. Fox in Back to the Future jean jacket that he STILL keeps hanging among his clothes, just in case a meteor strikes the earth and it comes back in style one day. [But that’s a topic for another blog.]

I got rid of the boots. Actually, I wore them for awhile first…but only a few times, and only when I was spending time with girl friends who would truly appreciate them. Before I knew it, it was spring and I went back to walking barefoot in the grass. I barely missed them at all.

And speaking of seasons, my two new pairs of non-boot shoes are really great for crunching fall leaves as I walk. Flip-flops can only squish. They also keep my feet firmly planted at the dog park while Sam, followed by a crew of Beagles, Chihuahuas, and Terriers, dash around my legs---most likely trying to get a closer look at my new shoes. And who can blame them?


Katie said...

Hi Kierstin,
I've never met you, I am a friend of your brother in law's (Josh.) I keep up with Jeremy's blog because I love his music and then he had a link to yours, so I thought I'd check it out. Bad idea for me to do at 2am when I'm exhausted, but I wanted to thank you for writing so real and so honestly. You write really well (which makes sense...) but also you're not afraid to tell who you are, and I think that is so incredible and so admirable. I had to skim some parts and not read it all right now b/c I am getting too wrapped up emotionally and need to be able to get some sleep, but I want to thank you because you've really inspired me to be more thankful for my father and to think about how to show him more how much I love him, and to thank God for him because he is so precious to me, and also led me to think about other things that have happened in my life and to reflect on them and what God has done in my life. I want you to know that my thoughts and prayers are with you through this time, and again I cannot thank you enough for sharing so openly, espceially so that me, someone who's never met you, would be able to read it and gain so much from it.


Katherine said...

Hey Kiersten,
You don't know me but I just wanted to say how much I looove your blog. You're a really talented writer! I found your site from Jeremy's blog. I'm a new fan, I came to his recent concert in Delaware with the wonderful Joe Bassett. Anyway, I also wanted to say how sorry I am to hear that your father recently passed away. You & your family were much in my prayers during that time. Our church prayed for you all as well, I just wanted you to know that. :) God Bless!
In Christ,